


Killing John Duncan

by Sweetestsarah08



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Character Death, Character Study, Child Abuse, Drug Use, Dubious Consent, Dubious Ethics, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Multi, Murder, Not Beta Read, Oral Sex, Overdosing, Religious Fanaticism, Torture, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-05-25
Packaged: 2020-03-17 01:00:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18954727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sweetestsarah08/pseuds/Sweetestsarah08
Summary: "The fact that no one knew of his inner rage made him all the more dangerous. He wanted to watch it all crumble; he wanted the world to burn.  Today, we know that it will burn, but in his heart of hearts, John always desired the apocalypse more than anyone." The Book of JosephAbout the young lawyer that died so John Seed could be reborn again.Snippets from his past. Character study and narrative.Not Beta Read.





	Killing John Duncan

**Author's Note:**

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> I put a lot of time into writing my fictions. If you enjoy them, please consider donating. It isn't an obligation but much appreciated. 
> 
> My style of formatting can be confusing but I hope you understand and enjoy it. It isn't a linear timeline. It is in the form of character studies and snippet narratives.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "When the Duncans sent him off to a prestigious law school on the East Coast, they believed they had succeeded in changing John Seed fundamentally. In a way, they were right. " - The Book of Joseph

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Setting the stage.
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> _** "You wear a mask for so long, you forget who you were beneath it. – Alan Moore" ** _

_ "Everything will be okay." Brilliant blue eyes look into his own, sadness fills them. Auburn hair. Smoke rising into the sky from the ashes. Police lights flashing in the background. Thick southern accents. _

__

_ "I'll see you again." A broken promise. _

__

_ That fire was the beginning of a new life for them. Goodbyes. Goodbye Jacob. Goodbye Joseph. _

__

_ Bright blue eyes, a shy smile, full head of messy brown hair. Tame it. Scars on his back? Look away. Keep them hidden. _

__

_ Most of all, John is willing and open. An open heart! Waiting for receiving love and to give love. _

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_ Bleeding heart. Bleeding scars. Keep them hidden. _

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_ Fire. It was the beginning. _

John Duncan wakes up. Dreams are fickle things. Fleeting and escaping. All he can recall is the glow of a fire. Feeling loneliness. That isn't an unusual feeling. The feelings of the waking world seep into his subconscious to infect every realm he exists in.

Soon he will need to meet with his adoptive father in the chapel. John, accepted into Yale this year. So he must give his thanks in the chapel and beg for forgiveness for his sins before he goes off to school. Through repentance and confession, he can continue to have their love. If he misses a confession it will put a crack into his facade. To have trust and his freedom, he will need to show them the John they want. Give them what they want from him. Repent? Yes. Confess? Yes. Get on his knees and beg for forgiveness for days at a time? Yes!

**YES**.

Yes, John can be everything they want in a son. A shining medal of achievement for them to tote to Church and in front of their friends. So well groomed and well mannered!

"What a handsome young man."

"What a polite young man."

"You must be so proud of him!"

_ Yes. _

He has their love and pride.

But what do they have from him? Disdain. Hatred. Thrilled to hear them speak of their aches and pains from aging. If only the Reaper could take them sooner than later. How he hates them. How he craves to see them dead. How dare they try to claim his achievements? They know nothing about who John is. They are fools. They don't know what sin is. They don't know how to absolve sin! Satisfied with lies that fit their ideals.

John is so close to being free from their ever-present demands of retribution!

Out there he can find himself. He can find happiness.

Only a few more weeks of playing this role for his adoptive parents. A role John knows well by now.

What are a few more scars in confession?

◥✥◤

◢✥◣

University is a new game but one John masters. People are transparent and helpless to resist his charms. John knows how to change his colors to be what he needs to be in any given situation.

A good student, studious and always put together for his professors.

Quick and witty to those who appreciate it. Gentle and kind to those who need it.

A listening ear for the confessions of so many. So much gossip. So many skeletons in the closets of his classmates and their families! Professors and staff also carry secrets and John learns how to get those secrets. Everyone sins. So many hope to keep their sins in the dark.

No sin  is hidden from God. Don't they care? No. Many are godless but they fear the social consequences. John learns how to play those fears to his advantage. It isn't making enemies. It is making himself a close friend. A friend they can't afford to anger. They have to stay in his good graces if they want him to hide their sins from the light.

John found out in his freshman year about one of his professors sleeping with a student. Committing adultery in the process. On top of that, they are giving this student special treatment in return for sex. Such sinful debauchery. It is a card in his deck to play at a later time. John makes sure he has adequate proof. Pictures. Snap snap snap of a camera and he has a favor secured in his pocket. John Duncan holds their futures in his hands but oh no, they need not worry! As long as the professors provide that favor when he cashes them in. Ah, the Professor can provide contacts. John doesn't need to smudge his grades to get by, he is doing well on his own merit. But contacts are priceless. More contacts. The network grows larger.

And so does his bag of secrets.

◥✥◤

◢✥◣

"John, is this your first time with a woman?" The innocent question falls from Alice's mouth. John has been eying her in his Advanced Legal Writing class and has taken her out three times in his rare spare time. It has made him impatient but the actor in him remains loyal to the role he plays. A gentleman, a gentle sheep. She wouldn't open herself to a wolf seeking to maul her.

 For her, he needs to be a safe place. Gentle, patient, and old fashioned.

But she is a virgin? She is voluptuous! A classic beauty with Grecian features. How she must guard herself.

 This is a new development. A challenge.

Rather than lie to her, he relies on distraction to ease her fears, "darling, are you having second thoughts? We can stop here if you are." It isn't something he wants to do but if the role commands it.

"No! No, John, I trust you. I-I love you," she confesses. "I know it's only been three dates but I've never connected with anyone like this before."

Cute. John fights the smirk. Holds the laugh back. Thinks of the lewd group of friends he has made. They would be cheering on his heartlessness. John will take from her despite knowing it makes him that much more like them. Callous and cruel. After this experience with him, she will be more guarded. He could ruin her for others. Installing a fear to trust. A bitterness.

 Spreading his bitter anger. She will feel the cold loneliness. 

His hand brushes against her cheek when he would rather wrap it around her throat.  "  I think that I am falling in love with you too, Alice," his eyes shine with mirth deriving from mockery but one can mistake it for true happiness . John finds many will lie to themselves to make themselves believe what they want to believe.  "Trust me," he moves his hand down to her neck - the predator in him enjoying how her breath hitches at his touch- his hand stays there on her chest, resting over her heart . Innocent but also enough to entice this to go further.

Your heart is speeding little rabbit.

"Trust me with this." Hand still over her heart.

"Oh John, I do. Please. Fuck. Please. I trust you."

So responsive to his touch.

So willing to believe his lies.

John works on her clothes and he rewards his patience by taking his time worshipping her guarded body . Kissing down her stomach. Taking her breath from her when he meets her eyes with his own brilliant blue eyes.

She reaches down to stroke his cheek this time, "you're so gorgeous, John."

John closes his eyes and reaches up to place his hand over hers, closing his eyes to nuzzle the delicate hand over his face . Enjoying her warmth and how soft she is. So fragile.

 And he will enjoy breaking a part of her.

Her beautiful features will look so breathtaking in pain and anguish. Will she will hate him?

John moves down to spread her legs to look at her fresh pink sex, glistening with her wet arousal.

She blushes so  sweetly in her innocence.

But even sweeter are the words that come from her like a whispered prayer as he lowers himself to taste.

_ "Y e s." _

◥✥◤

◢✥◣

Blood splattered on the floor. Not his own and not from his own actions.

 Luke -a friend from the first year- and Vincent -a new friend from 4th year- got into an altercation. It is 3 am. Two friends remain passed out in a pull out bed in this room. Four or five people downstairs. No one is awake to witness but John.

 Vincent lies on the ground, dead. Luke shoved him in a fit of aggression and paranoia fueled by the cocaine lines they've done tonight.  The push would've been harmless but unfortunately for Vincent, he landed on the corner of the fireplace, skull meeting brick .  

Now Luke is having a fit in the corner of the room, babbling to himself about his life being over. In the midst of the personal chaos, Luke grips his chest and he moves towards John, "please John..." John watches him with interest. The young law student crosses his legs and watches as Luke collapses on the carpet in front of him. "John," Luke chokes out before giving up his crawl to touch him. John watches his skin tone change to a pale color. Then blue after he loses consciousness.

 Silence in death. One friend dead, another dying. John feels elated the longer he stays seated. Each lifesaving second that ticks by, he feels pleasure rocket through him. Pleasure and power. John has life and death in hands. Luke begged with his last moments. Satisfaction. Beyond satisfaction, John feels pleasure at this new feeling. It is  similar to how he feels when he blackmails someone but it is on a grander scale. This is not a career or marriage but someone's life. And John sits with his legs crossed. 

Luke didn't deserve his mercy.

  In his reality, he hated them both. 

And this power is something he could become addicted to.

 Now he will leave the scene.  John refuses to get caught up in the aftermath that will come once those drunk out of their skulls wake up to find the scene . Luck has it, no police question John. It was as if he never attended that party.

 John won't be at their funeral.

◥✥◤

◢✥◣

Graduating top in his class took a few favors cashed in with the higher-ups looking to avoid scandal. John made good grades but his merit alone didn't get him that high honor. John's skills in manipulation did, manipulation and blackmail. Those skills sealed the deal and paved the way.

 John has the makings of a powerful lawyer, he absorbed a lot in university and not all lessons taught in the classroom .

Still, something is missing. What he wanted to find, happiness? It eludes him. John still feels that all-consuming emptiness. An open cavern in the pit of his being, threatening to consume him. Always searching, always hungry...looking for something to fill him with what he lacks. 

Many people found their way into his bed. The flesh didn't fulfill him.

 Drugs and alcohol didn't give him that happiness he was looking for either. 

Although the satisfaction was temporary -a mere distraction- it did pleasure a part of him that sought to be everything his adoptive parents hated . The rebellion was sweet. 

When he returns to Atlanta will the climb to the top hold his key to happiness? Will he find it in the power there at the top? Thinking back on his happiest moments in the years spent in college he can only find one pattern. Having a person at his mercy. The rare moments where he let people see the mania in his eyes. Watch as they realize his charming smile is more predatory in nature. The mask drops away and the sharp edges are visible.

The pride in his adoptive parent's eyes doesn't please him. John knows by now that he is not a son they love but a trophy and an heir. They are his critics but John knows how to appeal to them.

They will never know of his sins. How many masks he wears. They will die thinking he is proof of their methods and never  truly knowing how twisted he is under the surface. John, willing to take their money after they perish.

Southbound after graduation. A king looking for his throne in the city of Atlanta. Still, he starves for something to fill him. Wonders what true happiness tastes like. And if he doesn't find it? John will spread the misery. Take pleasure in the hedonistic distractions. 

No one will suspect that the beautiful man with the charming smile will be their downfall as he climbs the ladder to the top . Not until it is too late. Even then, they will be too enraptured with him. They will thank him for the knives in their back and he will twist that knife with glee as he makes his way. 

◥✥◤

◢✥◣

The condo he calls home now is sitting high in the skyline downtown.

His new job is secure as a promising young Yale graduate and already prospects to move up are in front of him. John thinks he should be at peace as he lies down to sleep,  happily alone in his condo. But that feeling of bitterness taints his subconscious and as he falls into slumber.

_The Fire burns still._

__

_ "John!" Someone is screaming. _

__

_ "Stop hitting him!" _

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_ Joseph watches from a distance, tears rolling down his cheeks. Unable to stop the pain. _

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_ "Fucking stop!" _

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_ John looks, trying to find the source of the anguished screams. _

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_ Jacob, his protector. Helpless to save him. _

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_ Brothers. _

__

_ Where are you? _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The largest portion of the narrative will follow in the coming chapters. I couldn't resist delving into character studies in his university life.
> 
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> [Support Me on Ko-fi](https://ko-fi.com/N4N8QSZN)


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